Geldoff: your official FEI ATHLETE representative!

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FEI representation straight from Geldoff's mouth!
FEI representation straight from Geldoff’s mouth!

To heck with democracy. Surely it’s first in, first served.

Princess Haya has laid out her vision if she’s re-elected to the presidency of the FEI and one of her very best ideas is to allow official athlete representation at FEI board level.

I am willing to throw my hat in the ring by nominating myself!

Was that Totilas seconding my nomination? (The carrot’s in the mail, buddy).

I do believe I saw Princess Haya raise her arm. Maybe she was scratching her nose, but, anyway, as far as I’m concerned, that’s a vote!

I’m in!

Geldoff is your very first official FEI ATHLETE representative!!!

You RIDER types can sod off and negotiate your own FEI representation with Princess Haya.

Now, down to business.

LDR v Rollkur - say what?
LDR v Rollkur – say what?

First up, this “Low Deep Round” claptrap. I don’t know whether you FEI types have noticed, but there’s stuff-all difference between this and the Rollkur that it replaced. I can’t believe you missed that!

Geldoff reckons it should be replaced with his “Free Flow As You Go” approach.

I think you get the picture.

Anyway, I’m freakishly busy, so here it is in a nutshell:

Eating: More.

Riding: Less.

Carrots: Plenty.

Training: It’s so last millennium.

I’ve put the word out to my horsey mates, so it shouldn’t be long before I have a full list of demands.

I’m pleased the princess has talked about diversifying income streams because we horses will be after a bigger slice of the action. Appearance money and half of any prize money, for a start.

Rest assured, Geldoff will be at the cutting edge of efforts to wind back bureaucracy. The rules across all disciplines will be much simpler. So simple, in fact, that even riders will be able to understand them.

I promise to listen to all points of view (if it suits me), and will always do the right thing (which may not necessarily be what anyone else wants).

Hey, that’s democracy at its finest. Or at least my form of it.

Happy grazing!

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